The 'Toy Boy Trend'

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I’ve never dated men my own age – not even as a teen. Personally, I’ve always found something more attractive in the older man; experience, maturity and the ability not to laugh at their own farts, generally (is that so much to ask?!). 


I have had just but one experience with someone younger. It was on a mini break with one of my girlfriends, and we were staying with her brother in his university accommodation. ‘Mini Break’ is a term used loosely in this case; whilst you may be picturing four poster beds and walks on a beach, it was much more Aldi vodka and a view of sweaty teens grinding on each other following £1 shots. Regardless, post coitus and after rolling around university halls in my knickers at 4am – I was mortified. I couldn’t get to grips with the fact that I’d allowed a younger man to slip it in. I mean, I was most likely still drunk and over-reacting hideously because he was only a year younger than me, but it just shows that personal preference reigns; as fucking always. 


It’s no government secret that many of us women favour a younger man – more commonly referred to as the ‘toy boy’ (and without the unwarranted ‘Mrs Robinson’ subtext). Admittedly, I get it. For an older woman, to be shown interest by a younger man must be exciting and a real boost to the ego. As mentioned in my prior article; sexual attentiveness and the ability to get and stay aroused decreases for men as they increase in age. So, if she’s not getting it from her middle-aged husband, is she wrong to leave him for a twenty-something in his sexual prime?

Sixteen per cent of relationships in France are now between an older woman and a younger man, with the stat thought to increase over the next decade. Ooh La La! Reportedly, they believe that embracing a man their junior keeps life more interesting. Can’t argue with that now, can you?


Cheryl Cole has recently announced that she is pregnant with Liam Payne’s baby – and people are losing their shit over it. She’s only ten years his senior but they initially met when he was just 14. Bearing in mind he was an X Factor contestant and she was a judge, they hardly leapt into each other’s knickers from day dot. But it is something the British public can’t wrap their heads around – claiming she is a ‘cougar’ at just 33. To be in the public eye 24/7 must be hard enough, but to have them document every relationship, every affair and every heartbreak must be devastating. And guaranteed, all those spending their days fretting over Cole and Payne’s relationship have been witness to her numerous and oh so public prior breakups. So, because she is a little older than her current boyfriend – we shouldn’t allow her the opportunity to be happy? I’m not so sure this theory would stand in court…


If you haven’t watched the entire Desperate Housewives box set multiple times then we probably aren’t close friends, but one of the premier storylines through the first few series was the affair that gorgeous, glamorous, recently retired Model Gaby Solis embarked upon with John Rowland – her seventeen year old gardener. Inevitably, she was a bored housewife neglected by her career and money obsessed husband and desperate for attention and affection. But he was young, naïve and a virgin; and, obviously (in classic noughties sit com style), he fell madly in love with her. So, she broke his heart.


Many ladies claim that a younger lover or more youthful life partner is the sole reason for keeping them looking, and feeling, so young. Somewhat, I agree. It is contributors like fresh air and increased physical activity – both in and out of the bedroom – that are scientifically proven to preserve the aging process – all traits most commonly found in the younger bracket of the population.


Within reason, age is and should just be a number. Trading your ex in for a younger model is somewhat of a trend – just look at some of the scandals throughout history and the lessons they’ve taught us. Bill cheated on Hillary Clinton with Monica Lewinsky. He was 49, she was 22. Mr Big ditched Natasha for our gal Carrie.  And I’m sure you’ve witnessed similar behaviour. Single men and women should behave as they damn well please, providing they are not hurting anyone – am I right? So why is it ever only women branded with unsavory names after displaying this particular behavior? Think about it; when a woman gets a new partner she’s either a cradle snatcher or a grave robber… and a man behaving in the same way gets to keep his ‘stud status’. Why are we always the cougars and the gold-diggers and never on the receiving end of a pat on the back and a dirty laugh? It all boils down to age old sexism – and the best advice I could give anyone looking for a partner of any age? Do what the fuck you want. Do what makes you happy.



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